Trust (London Love #5)

And me sat here with my hand down my trousers, cupping my junk.

I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular. Absolutely not. I sat like this all the time. But my dick was getting harder with every sound from the bathroom.

Nope. No.

Not happening.

With a growl, I got up and went to sort out the kitchen, willing my boner to go down. Gray was in the shower while I was slowly losing my marbles. I waited until he was done, listening for the familiar click of the door, the light being turned off as he disappeared into my room.

Madness. Everywhere.

I reclaimed the bathroom, brushing my teeth and washing myself down. Tried to have a pee, which didn’t work, so I had a shower instead and finally calmed myself down. Good.

Towel around my waist, I grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and crept into my room, kicking about on the floor for clean boxers. Or anything really. I put on the first pair I found and took my meds, shaking my head at the complete cesspit of a room we currently shared.

“I’m not moving in with you, because you don’t do laundry. There are, like, weeks’ worth of clothes on the floor. Seriously, Gray?”

“I’ll do laundry tomorrow,” he mumbled out from under the covers. He had his back towards me, and I could only see his hair, fanned out on the pillow.

He held the duvet up, so I could get in, revealing his bare back and arse covered by those minimalistic things he called underpants. Tight black fabric.

Nope. Down, dick. We’re not doing this.

It had been a long time since I’d jerked off. An even longer time since I’d had any kind of sex. That was it. I was just oversexed. Obviously, I needed to make some time to deal with that. Lock myself in the bathroom and watch porn and jerk off.

I got in the bed and lay on my side, back to him, boner well out of reach. Sighed as he turned around and spooned me, his arm around my waist, hand landing a little too low on my stomach.

I shivered. He kissed my shoulder, settled in a little closer.

“How would this work, G?” I asked quietly. Frustrated. As always.

“What?” he asked sleepily. I should just shut up.

“Sex,” my mouth said instead. “How would we have sex? I mean. I’m not having you shove anything up my backside.”

“Rude.” He was smiling. I could tell.

“No. Just a question. You’re trying to make this sound so easy. You have a dick. I have a dick. And where are we supposed to shove them?”

“So romantic.” He kissed my shoulder again. “You know, Reubs, it’s not that complicated. Firstly, it’s not all about penetration. I’ve offered it before, and I will offer it again. I really like sucking cock. Just throwing that out there. No obligation.”

“Good to know.” I smiled as well. This was so very much him. Very much us.

“And I can show you. Very gently with nothing bad happening. Like, if I…”

His legs pushed against mine, and his package…well. No, Gray. Nope. But I didn’t move because he was just there with his arms around me, and then his hand moved down. Gently, slowly, at the same time as his mouth pressed against my neck. A small, soft kiss. And fingers playing with the waistband of my undies.

Stretching.

I made a little sound. He shushed me.

“I’m going to just touch you. Nothing will happen, and you tell me when to stop. If it’s too much, I’ll stop.”

“That’s what all the bad guys say.”

To be honest? Yes. I was scared shitless.

“It’s just me. And I know you. Do you trust me?”