Lib Novel Page 92
I glance over to see if she is buying it, and after a moment of silence, she smacks her hand on my shoulder. “You need to stop with the alcohol. Elsa told me you’ve been drinking a lot lately.”
I roll my eyes inwardly. Drinking a lot, my ass. I took a few shots in the bar the other night, and suddenly I’m an alcoholic in Elsa’s eyes.
“Yeah. You’re right,” I mutter.
“Have you taken anything for that eye?” Rita asks, concern evident in her voice.
If I were to say yes, she wouldn’t believe me. I am wearing a long-sleeve sweater and a pair of leggings, so she can’t see the discolored skin that’s left on the rest of my body after consuming all those healing potions. All she can see is the black eye.
She takes my silence as a negative and nudges me. “Go into my bedroom. I have a healing potion on the bedside table. I can see that your eye is hurting. It will help.”
I don’t know if using so many potions is a good idea, but I’m in no position to deny what is clearly an order. I get up and walk slowly, like an old woman, toward the bedroom at the other end of the cottage. There is nothing on the bedside table, but when I open its drawer, I see three vials. Next to them is a black cell phone that catches my eye.
I pick up the phone. I’ve never seen it before. I remember that when Rita arrived here, the first time we met, she was trying to buy a cell phone. I helped her get a purple flip phone at the local supermarket. To my knowledge, she is still using it. So, where did this one come from?
Before I can think any further, the phone vibrates. The screen comes to life, and a text message pops up.
“Have you managed to find out the identity yet?”
Identity? Whose identity?
I glance toward the doorway. Is Rita still working? I’m pretty sure she is retired, a pack elder now.
I hear her voice call out my name, and I quickly put the phone back. Taking one of the vials, I close the drawer before making my way outside again. I ponder whether I should ask her about the black phone. Is it really any of my business?
“Oh, you found it!” Rita beams at me. “That’s a strong one. It should work its magic within an hour.”
I hesitate, but the way she’s watching me like a hawk, I really have no choice but to take the potion right now. I toss the liquid down my throat, feeling the warmth hit my system almost immediately. It tastes different from the other healing potions that I use: incredibly bitter. I give Rita a questioning look as I sit down, trying not to throw up at the same time, and she gives me a sly smile. “You won’t find that at the healer’s office. It’s much more potent.”
Alarm hits me like a ton of bricks. Should I really have taken such a powerful potion after consuming so many others overnight? There is such a thing as too many healing potions. An overdose can cause a breakdown in the nervous system.
I’m getting to my feet when Rita, still feeling social, pulls me back down. “So, how goes it with your love life? Considering you’re letting Noah court you, I assume you’ve chosen to reject your fated mate?”
Not this topic again. Why is everyone so invested in my business? I just shrug, choosing not to answer.
“So, who is it?” Rita leans forward, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. “Who is the mystery man that fate handpicked for you?”
For a moment, I feel there’s a hint of mocking in her tone. But when I look at her, her eyes seem to be sincere. Did I imagine it?
“It’s not important.” I shake my head. “Fate got this one wrong. He and I are incompatible.”
I think back to the way Alex was wrapped around me when I woke up this morning, so warm and soft. I’ve never slept snuggled against a wolf before, but I don’t think his fur was the source of my comfort. It was his presence. It gave me a sense of safety.
Deny it as I may, the real reason I didn’t fight harder to kick Alex out of my apartment is because I didn’t want him to leave.
My pride is hurt at his rejection. I understand his reasons, but it doesn’t hurt any less. And he’s not helping the situation by showing me constant concern. It’s like a knife being thrust into my chest. I want to hate him so desperately, but ever since he told me his rationale, and after overhearing the conversation between him and Patrick, I can’t summon the kind of hatred that would help me move past him.
His motives are noble and self-sacrificing, and they shouldn’t upset me this much. Children are involved; their lives are at stake. I know my anger and resentment stem from a place of loneliness. I also know that there is a certain amount of self-loathing within me. If I were able to shift forms, Alex might not have been forced to reject me.
I’ve managed to build up my self-esteem over the years, but the first time I saw Julia with Alex, it came crashing down.
I’m simply not good enough. I’m simply not wolf enough.
Rita must have seen the tears in my eyes because she puts her hand on my knee, her voice distressed. “Sophia?”
I try to speak, but I don’t trust myself to say anything. It feels like somebody’s squeezing my heart so tight that I can barely draw in air. I get to my feet, stumbling a bit.
“I should go. I have to leave.”