Lib Novel Page 48
I huff. “Of course, she is,” I tell her with a weird sense of pride I should not be feeling. Have no right to feel. But that little girl is the most perfect creation. Just as her mom is.
God, they were so beautiful when little Mellie was nestled on her chest right after she was born. My eyes still sting every time I remember that moment. Which is why I try to avoid any mention of those two.
“But she’s been fussy,” mom continues, and my spine snaps up. That’s the first I hear of Mellie not doing great and it’s partially because anytime someone around me started talking about them, I immediately left, not wanting to torture myself.
Despite tiny alarm bells going off in my head that I should leave like I always do, this time I stay. Silently listening for any nugget of information about my little watermelon.
“I guess it’s a good thing Jenny decided to call that guy to come and help Zoe.”
“What guy?” The question flies out of my mouth like a bullet after passing through my insides, grazing that hole that’s already been there since that day at the hospital.
“Oh, the one she was seeing before she left.”
Is it just me or is there an annoying ringing sound over here? It’s so loud I can’t hear what else my mother is saying. Did someone turn off the lights too? Why has everything suddenly gone dark?
Most importantly…did someone just punch me in the gut?
Some random guy thinks he can just show up and be what? Zoe’s boyfriend again? Mellie’s father? And what the hell is wrong with my mom and her friends for encouraging this?
The roaring in my ears intensifies and I have to grab onto the table, my knuckles turning white.
“Did she?” I grit through my teeth without looking up because I love my mom dearly but right now that fact seems small and unnecessary with all the anger coursing through my veins.
“Did she what?” Her voice is so calm like we are talking about next week’s menu and not about my life crumpling to the ground.
“Did she already call him?”
“Oh, yeah, I think she said he’s coming later today.” That’s it, that roaring in my head is a full-blown explosion now.
“What the fuck, mom?” I roar, snapping my eyes wide to her so she can see the bloody murder written in each speckle of my irises.
“Language, Matteo!” she snaps back. “And what does it matter to you, anyway? It’s not like you wanted a family ever in this lifetime, no?”
She’s baiting me. I know it. My brain understands it.
The only problem?
My heart doesn’t give a single fuck. Too bad it doesn’t get to call in the shots here. It doesn’t know what’s best for me. Or more importantly, what’s best for Zoe and Mellie.
So, I just hum in response, ignoring the tiny cracking noises coming from that glass in my hands.
It’s for the best.
That guy is probably older, has a respectable, stable job and doesn’t think monogamy is a curse word. Someone who can take care of Zoe and Mellie. He must have his shit figured out and knows what he wants in life.
Maybe he’s even the one who is the real father to Mellie.
Fuck, I pause for a second, breathing hard through the burn in my chest. Why do I feel so irrationally pissed right now? Of course there is a real father somewhere out there. The one who actually has the right to be there for Zoe and their daughter.
“I don’t,” I finally respond to mom, but don’t lift my eyes up. “Hope he can help her.”
I hear a long sigh from mom, but I don’t have the time to decipher it. I have to clean this glass.
Then I’ll clean one more. And another. I will keep cleaning these fucking glasses until the roaring in my head and the tremble in my hands stops. Until that simmering range settles down.
An hour and fifty-six glasses later a female voice calls out my name, pulling me from my destructive thoughts that haven’t settled one bit. I look up and see Linsey waving me over.
She’s wearing a too-tight-for-her top once again, the one that barely contains her tits inside. Her lips are painted a bright pink, the same color as her nails and she is looking at me like I’m to be her dinner tonight. Or she is to be my desert.