Page 62
Suddenly, he reached out for my journal and took it out of my hands, setting it on the table. “I’m sorry he scared you,” he told me, my heart picking up as his eyes darkened.
Reldron’s paper skin. Now was not the time for this. I had to focus. I had to get back to the city. I had things I had to deal with.
I pushed myself to a stand. “I’m notscaredof your High King, Cole,” I replied, walking over to a random stack just to busy myself. “He’s just a jerk on a power trip. So long as he waits to kidnap and torture me untilafterI get Mark here then…” I shrugged. Not wanting to finish that sentence.
“He’s not going to kidnap you,” Cole replied, his chair scraping across the floor.
I crouched down, thumbing through the journals mindlessly. “That’s what he does, Cole. If I know that better than you already, then maybe you need to get another job.”
“He won’t kidnap you,” he repeated carefully. “He’s not going to lay a finger on you, I won’t let him.”
I huffed, pretending I hadn’t found what I was looking for, and stood, turning to face him. “So, if he tells you to let it happen, you won’t do what he says?”
“No,” he stated, walking up to me. “I won’t.”
I rolled my eyes, folding my arms across my chest. “Your entire job is to listen and do what he says. I’ve come to terms with it, you need to as well.” I hadn’t come to terms with it, but I didn’t have the time to have a mental breakdown right now, so this was all I had to give it.
He grabbed my chin, his touch gentle, warm. His fingers calloused, scratching at the skin he managed to touch around the veil. “I won’t let him.”
I searched his eyes, wondering if he could see what surrounded mine. Even if he had dull senses, he should have noticed, yet he hadn’t questioned it yet. Not once.
Maybe he had seen it and chalked it up to the attack yesterday. That was good, it’s what I had wanted.
He wanted to have sex, a blind person could see that, and maybe I should. Despite his High King’s threats, maybe getting a release would help me feel better or feelsomethingdifferent than what I was feeling now. Besides, we were the same in several aspects. Maybe that’s what I needed to break myself of these terrible thoughts. Fuck someone like me. See how he healed and follow his example.
He had already said he couldn’t do certain things, that was perfect. It was exactly what I had been looking for.
“There are rules,” I finally said, placing a hand on his chest as he slowly moved forward.
Cole paused, his eyes locked on my veil, on where my lips were. I wondered if he could see through it. And if he could, why did he not say anything about the cut on my lipthe other day? Not that it mattered, but…it did a little. Just a little. “Rules?”
I nodded as his hand slowly moved under my veil, sliding up my jaw, but making no move to push it away. “Clothes on, veil on, no kissing.”
He rose his brows finally meeting my eyes. “No kissing?”
I wanted to kiss. Ineededto kiss. Kissing, deep, passionate kissing got me going in a way nothing else could, but I couldn’t do that right now. My lips weren’t healed, my face was bruised. So today, it had to remain basic. “You want to fuck me, you play by my rules,” I told him confidently although something like fear trickled down my spine.
Fear and excitement. The High King had made his rules clear too, and maybe that’s why my stomach was warming. Because I knew it would piss him off. Me fucking his High General. I could prove to him that he wasn’t as terrifying as he thought he was. That I still had freewill. I was still in control.
It was the perfect excuse to let Cole rail me.
Cole smiled softly and shrugged then, his other hand sliding around my waist. “I can live with that this time.” He pulled me against him, my breath catching as his hot breath soaked into my veil.
I swallowed, scanning his face for only a moment before I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his hips, feeling his already hardened cock fighting to break free. I guess he had been wanting this for a while.
Good.
I grinded against it,closing my eyes, digging my nails into his back, trying to focus.
Focus on him. On how he felt against me, on how his hands traveled from my waist to my thighs, on how his fingers dug into me.
He carried me over to the table and sat me down, leaning back just enough to pull at the ties on my pants.
I reached out, pulling at his, focused solely on the act. On how the outline of his cock pressed against his pants. I needed this. I needed this to happen. I needed to get out of my head, to erase what I was thinking.
I needed this to give me a release so that I could be reformed. I needed to be reformed. Soft and loving, not violent and sickening.
Soft and loving.