Sink With Me

“It must’ve been exhausting playing your part for so long.” Looking back at Karma, I narrow my eyes. Clearly, it wasn’t all that difficult considering she’s fucking insane, but I’ll give her credit. She played her part well.

“Dealing with your woe is me act? Yes.” She whispers with a dangerous grin tightening my arms behind the chair, making me wince and pull against the burn of rope wrapping them.

“Knock it off, Karma.” Dutton snaps louder than a whisper. His usual upkeep self looks so distraught and disheveled with black soot lining his outfit and his hair tousled. Karma looks even worse with a broken nose and her clothes ripped.

“Someone is antsy.” I purr. I know it’s ballsy but I’m confident they know they can’t kill me now unless they want our war to extend into the outside world.

“I bet if she looked more like her father, you’d let me. It was stupid for you to get so love-struck. Isn’t that what you punished me for? Now look at you.” my head snaps to Dutton after the bold statement falls off Karma’s tongue. He stands tall, looking down at me from the bridge of his nose with a snarl on his lips like I said the words.

You look so much like your mother.

My brows furrow piecing together the small moments and uncomfortable touches. A chill wracks my spine as the realization hits. He never wanted to punish me because he didn’t like feeling like he was torturing her but he didn’t stop because he needed me to be what Karma wasn’t.

“Oh, my God… you loved her?” I push. I knew Dutton was fucked and went off the rails, but everything is clicking now. The stolen glances at my mother, him always showing up when he was least needed, the argument they had before she left on the ship with my father. It still doesn’t explain his overly excited demeanor when I gave him my position.

“What was the point?”

“I would’ve given her the world.”

Dutton’s body falls to the ground so fast that I can’t even process the movement of Tide pressing a gun to the back of his head.

“Taking a page from my father’s book, I see. It’s nice to meet you, Red.” Tide muses, remaining focused on the body at his feet, every vein bulging in his arm as he grips the handle. My chest swells with the need to breathe him in and make sure he’s there.

“Correct.” Dutton sighs, shifting on his knees. Taking the moment, I focus on the steady rise and fall of Caspian’s chest. The open building darkens, and specks of dust float in the air tickling my nose. He came for me. I knew I felt him but seeing him is like a life jacket wrapping around my body. Saving me like he always has.

“She is gone, but I made a promise. Choose me and I’ll give her everything. She was going to love me, ya know? I was going to make sure of it.”

I swallow hard. She would never have chosen him. She loved my father. I saw it. He’s just as psychotic as Karma. A small snarl is shot in my direction like Dutton can already sense what I was thinking.

“Your father wasn’t going to be a problem. The whole point of my ship following there wasn’t to help but to take care of him on Depth land. She’d have no choice but to choose me.”

“I feel like I should get a thank you, I helped.” Karma mutters into my ear, her hot breath hitting my skin. This bitch. I throw my head back and relish in the soft squeak she lets out from the sudden connection. She’s lucky I’m tied or I would’ve done worse. I’ve never been one to torture my victims, but the thought seems appealing right now. A tooth falls to the ground beside my chair.

“Anyway.” Dutton’s nose turns up at the sight, making Tide push the barrel to the back of his head so his face is down. “Even with Karma’s screw up I was still able to pin Depth. Cordi here just made it that much easier.” Dutton smirks at me as if his life isn’t on the line. I swallow hard. Maybe because it’s not. A cold steel blade grazes under my chin, forcing my head to remain upright despite the way my stomach drops. I thought maybe I could hide it. It was sad wishing that he’d never find out. He came for the one person he should’ve watched drown.

“Isn’t that right?” Dutton says a little louder, ignoring the man behind him. Tides’ gun raises at Karma, making Sam appear from the shadows aiming his own at Dutton. I swallow against the blade, never letting my eyes stray from Tides. Every one of his muscles flexes with a deep inhale. He doesn’t have to speak. This is it. The moment I dreaded, the second that had morphed its way into my nightmares. I always knew I was falling for him, no matter how hard my trained instincts tried to convince me otherwise. It’d never last because I’m no better than the man I once thought he was.

“What happened to his father? Who made the order?” A shot rings out, followed by a sharp cry. Sam drops clutching at his waist, sending his weapon skidding across the floor. My mind scrambles but this it’s from pure panic. I jerk against the rope, feeling the blade press against my throat hard enough to break the skin. Tide keeps his barrel pointed at Karma despite the one coming to head level with him as Dutton stands, breathing hard.

“What’s he talking about?” Tide looks at me with those deep green eyes holding me captive in my mind.

“Cordelia!” He yells loud enough it makes me flinch when I remain silent longer than he likes. I wish I could say something, anything, but my throat feels like it’s swelling shut making each swallow harder than the last.

“I see.” He sucks the back of his teeth with a nod. “That pretty little head of yours couldn’t think logically for five seconds, could it?” The words spew like venom, striking against every inch of skin he once worshiped. Memories flash like an in-head movie, forcing me to relive each crooked smile and late-night conversation.

He’s right. If I would’ve thought before I made the decision, this would’ve never started. How can I regret it though when it leads me to him? I can’t apologize for being pulled from the water by the person who calmed the voices in my head. The man who made me feel human. The monster who let me dream again.

“You could’ve told me.” Tide whispers, his voice barely registering over the thumping in my ears. I blink away tears just so I can properly see his face twisted in both agony and anger. I wish he’d be mad at me for a logical reason like the fact his father would still be here if it wasn’t for me but instead he’s hurt that I didn’t just tell him. If I thought I hurt physically, it doesn’t compare to how I feel emotionally.

Karma presses the knife deeper. I was always told that depth was manipulative and knowledgeable of all things mental, but I’ve been under the thumb of the most notorious liar there is. It’s my fault. Every second leading up to this point, I let myself fall into step behind Dutton, thinking the way he always wanted me to. Now I’ve lost the one person I didn’t know I’d want to keep.

Letting out a breath I accept my fate as I stay focused on Caspian’s form, tightly lined with tension from his shoulders down to his locked legs. My blood drips down my throat streaking under my shirt. Love used to be an unknown emotion. I was only able to compare it to the shine in my father’s eyes when he looked at my mother or the way her laugh carried through the air when he said something funny. But now I feel it gripping at my chest, trying to throw my heart at his feet.

“You were right. It’s easier to die for someone than it is to live for them.”

“This is getting boring.” Karma sighs behind me, gripping my hair, tilting my head back so far, I see spots. I just want to see him.

“Stop!” Someone yells and I pray to a God I’m unsure exists that it isn’t the foul-mouthed teen who taught me what it’s like to be welcomed.