Savior Complex: A Small Town Love Triangle Romance

“You don’t,” he agrees.

I stare at the phone. My hands are a mess, and I have half a mind to pick up his phone just so I can get barbecue sauce and grease all over it. But I have a smidge of decency left.

I get up and wash my hands, then sit back down and hold my hand out. He places the phone in my hands.

Brayden: I told her tonight. I didn’t name you, but I let her know that I cheated on her. Then I told her it was over. And Nina, it’s over. She wants to wait until after Claire and Ethan’s wedding to say anything, and against my better judgment, I agreed. Only because I feel like I owe her this one last thing. But say the word, and I’ll end it all. I’ll do anything to be with you, to live every day like we did this weekend. Just to wake up to you is everything my soul has been crying out for. Just to taste your smile, to breathe in your breath, to hold your body against mine, skin to skin. I don’t want us to end. But the look in your eyes when I left you this morning tells me that you think it’s over. Is it, though? Have I fucked things up that badly? Will you find it in your heart to forgive me for not fighting right from the beginning? Because that first day I saw you was the day I fell in love with you. The first day I kissed you was the day I knew you’d forever be under my skin. And whether you take me back or not, I will be yours forever. There is no one else for me, Nina. There’s only you.

My eyes sting, the tears threatening to fall as I read the last line of his text. I won’t show him emotion, though. I should just hand the phone back now after reading the first text. But my eyes won’t let me, and my finger disobeys as it scrolls down the phone, revealing the next text, then the next, and the next.

Brayden: You’re killing me, Nina. I deserve this, I know. But I can’t let you go, and in the slim chance that you’re actually reading this, I’ll continue to tell you every day. I love you. I love you. I love you.

Brayden: This morning I was thinking about the first time I woke up to you in my bed. You were still asleep, and I just watched you breathe. You have the most beautiful lips, and it was the hardest thing not to touch mine to yours just to remember what they felt like. But I refrained, and I’ll always remember. I remember now, how soft you are to me, how you feel like home. How I could kiss you for hours, nothing more, and feel complete.

Brayden: Today, the guys and I took a tour out to the beach, and there was one family with a reluctant son who wanted nothing more than to stay in the cabin and play video games. None of the guys could get this kid to enjoy himself, not even Levi, who’s usually a hit with the kids. All I kept thinking about was that day you helped out on a tour and got that one kid to put down his devices and have a good time. If you’d been on today’s tour, there’s no doubt in my mind that you could’ve gotten this kid to smile, maybe even have a great time.

I think about you every day. How you were on the ranch. How you were with my family. How much they love you. I think about what it would be like to have you here all the time, with my ring on your finger, and our futures combined. I think about that a lot, actually. Nina Winters. It kind of has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? Or maybe you’d want to stay Nina Chance. I don’t care either way. I just want you, any way I can have you.

Brayden: I should tell you that Jordy is living here on the ranch. Not in the house, and definitely not in my bed. My mom heard she was staying in a hotel, and even though I told her we weren’t together, she still invited her to stay. You know my mom. I know what you’re thinking, because I’m thinking it too. This is fucking stupid. Nina, this whole thing is fucking stupid. The fact that I’m here and you’re there is fucking stupid. The fact that I haven’t just driven to your house to tell you how I feel is fucking stupid. But you’re not taking my calls. I don’t blame you. I’d ignore me too. You placed a boundary, and as much as I want to plow through it, I’ll respect it. But only because there’s a time limit here. As soon as I’m free, I’ll be on your doorstep, boundary or not, begging you to take me back. And Nina, I’m not sure I know how to take no for an answer. So…don’t say no, okay?

Brayden: Do you ever think of me? I had this horrible thought today that you’ve completely forgotten all about us, and I can barely think of anything else but you.

Brayden: I’m sitting outside your house, and I’m so damn nervous, I can barely breathe. The guys pulled me aside today when I came home from seeing you. Told me to stop moping around like a bitch and get my girl. It’s like they could see the heartbreak all over my body. Who am I fooling? I’ve been like this since the conference. But today, after being in that coffee shop and not able to tell you how I feel, I was torn up inside. The way she kept grabbing my hand in front of you… Nina, I saw your face. I saw the way it made you feel to see her with me. While I never want to hurt you again, it did give me a sliver of hope that you won’t turn me away tonight, that maybe you miss me as much as I miss you.

And Nina? You’re my girl. I’m so fucking crazy about you, I haven’t been able to sleep. I’ve barely been able to eat. If we have to burn every bridge just to be together, I’m ready to light this whole damn world on fire.

So here I am, about to approach your door for the first time in forever, praying that you’ll let me in.

Because I’m so in love with you, and I hope you love me too.

I can barely read the last text because my vision is too blurry. I swipe at my eyes, then look up at Brayden. He’s watching me with tears in his eyes too. I push my soggy French fries at him.

“Here,” I say. He looks down at the fries, then back at me, his brow furrowed.

“What is this for?”

“You said you’ve barely been able to eat,” I say, and his face breaks into a grin. “I just thought I’d—hey!” I laugh as he catches me around the waist and swings me off the stool. I don’t fight him. I was done fighting him before those texts. But now?

His mouth lands on mine and it’s a full on claiming. Without words he tells me that we’re never going through this again, that he’s mine and I’m completely, head over heels his.

But the thing is, falling into bed with him is not going to undo all the things we need to talk about. I push against his chest, and he reluctantly releases me.

“There’s too much to say right now,” I tell him, and he wrinkles his brow but nods. “And I’m still mad, even if I get it.”

I sit down, folding my hands in front of me. He does the same. I could speak. I could tell him all the ways he affected me these past few weeks. How much I missed him, and how much it hurt to see him this morning. But I need words from him; I need to hear in his own voice every way he’s feeling, and what he plans to do now.

I need to know that I’m not going to get my hopes up only to play second fiddle. Because I’m done with this shit.

“First, Jordy and I are done. I broke up with her the night we came back.”

“Yeah, about that. She’s living with you?” I tilt my head at him.

“I know,” he groans. “It’s my mom. She’d take in every stray if she could, humans included. I told her this was like taking Jordy’s side over her own son’s, but she wouldn’t listen. She said Jordy had been too important of a person to me to just toss in a hotel, especially now that Jordy was recovering from a breakup.”

I feel a little guilty at this. Angie insisted on taking Jordy in like she was family. But I’m Jordy’s actual family, and I’m the one who kicked her out.

“Your mom probably thinks I’m trash.” I grimace, absolutely gutted by the thought. I really love Brayden’s mom. Just as much as I miss Brayden, I miss working in the kitchen with Angie. She talked to me like we’d known each other for years, and it made me feel like I meant something to her. But now?

“No, Nina. She actually understands. I told her how Jordy swept in and got rid of all your grandmother’s things, and my mom was shocked but not surprised. Jordy doesn’t have a sentimental bone in her body. She doesn’t place meaning on things the way most people do, which is great if you want to live a minimalist life. But it’s not so great when you have family heirlooms. She sees the price tag, not the history that goes along with them.” He takes my hand in his, running his thumb over my skin with reassurance. “Besides, she figures it’s probably best under the circumstances that you and Jordy don’t live together.