Love, Utley (Love Letters #1)

That Maddox.

That Maddox is here.

“Hannah?” My manager’s voice cuts through the noise in my head.

I blink and find her standing behind Brandon in my doorway.

She smiles, unaware that my mental stability is rapidly unraveling. “You’re up.”

I swallow and nod. “Okay.”

She moves away from my door as I push out of my desk chair.

Brandon is still here, taking up space. He says something about luck before finally turning around and exiting, leaving me alone in my office.

Maddox is here.

I take a breath.

You can do this.

I take a second breath.

You’re a bad bitch.

I clench my jaw.

You deserve this position.

I unclench my jaw.

You’ve worked your ass off since…

I take a deep breath in through parted lips.

I’ve worked my ass off every day of my fucking life to get to where I am.

I moved back home after that one week of living on campus.

I went from the prospect of student life to working full time— scratch that, overtime— at Petals.

I spent my days in the flower shop and my evenings attending online classes to finish my bachelor’s degree in accounting. And what was supposed to take me three semesters at HOP U ended up taking me five long years.

Five years of worrying about paying the mortgage. Worrying about Mom’s medical bills and the cost of physical therapy. And when it finally seemed like we might have a handle on things, have a plan, my cousin died, and everything changed again. Giving me even bigger worries and responsibilities.

I spent five years under crushing stress as I watched Maddox graduate from college. Get drafted into the NFL. Play his rookie season in Arizona. Go to the playoffs in his second season. Play in the Super Bowl in his third season.

I watched him excel.

I watched him guest anchor for college games.

I watched him living his best life.

Blinking, I tip my head back toward the ceiling.

Keep it together, Hannah.

None of this is new. His success isn’t new.