Dead of Summer

And the fact he’s making it pretty clear this was just a game for him. Just something to pass the time and give him some amusement while we waited out the week.

My heart shouldn’t ache.

I shouldn’t want to cry.

Because Kayde doesn’t, and will never, love me. So I won’t let myself have any kind of feelings for a fucking murderer who was intent on slaughtering the kids of Camp Crestview for fun.

He wanted to kill Kinsley.

But not you, that unhelpful little voice in my brain whispers wickedly. He was never going to kill you. He wanted to keep you.

That really shouldn’t make it better whatsoever. And it shouldn’t make my heart twist even more in my chest as I shove myself upright to blink at the room around me.

Only to find, like I thought, that Kayde isn’t here.

He never is, I chastise myself, dragging my body out of bed and changing into shorts and a tee. I’m sore, I realize with a wince, and my teeth grit together as I press my palm to my lower stomach. Yeah, okay, I did not expect to be this sore today.

But I can’t really hate it. Will Kayde notice? Will he care?

Part of me thinks he might be thrilled at that fact. Like a little parting gift as he leaves; to know he’s made me so sore I’ll feel this for days.

I can hear the kids in the cabin next to me by the time I’m toeing on my shoes, and as I open my door to my little deck, I see Melody push open the main door and start toward Otter Hall.

“So cruel to leave your devoted counselor behind,” I call, catching up to her easily with long strides. I bet they’re all packed by now. And I’m sure half of them are counting down the minutes until their parents start showing up.

But I find I’m a little sad. This has been my favorite group of campers all summer, and I’ll miss Melody most of all. Even if she is a little sociopath like Kayde had labeled her.

When she smiles slyly up at me, I can’t help but wonder what it is about her that makes him so sure. Unless he’d been joking with me, Kayde had said with confidence that Melody is a sociopath like him.

Takes one to know one, had essentially been his words. As Melody looks at me with eyes clearer and more mature than most twelve-year-olds I’ve ever met, I can only say for certain that she’s different from the other kids. I’m not one to guess further than that, though, and I only smile back at my favorite problematic twelve-year-old. “You excited to go home?” I ask her, surprised when she shakes her head.

“Not this year,” Melody sighs, world-weary and disappointed. “I’m not looking forward to school starting. We moved,” she adds, explaining her reasoning before I can ask. “I don’t like being the new kid.”

“Really?” I tilt my head to the side, my hands shoved in my pockets. The closer we get to the already full dining hall, the more my heart flutters in my chest. I hadn’t expected Kayde to stay the night, sure, but I also can’t help but wonder what his expression will be when he sees me.

I wonder what he’ll say.

“Really,” Melody repeats, hopping onto the small path that leads up to the double doors. “I have to make new friends, navigate social circles. Figure out who’s in charge…” She shakes her head, lamenting the amount of ‘work’ she’ll be doing. “But it’ll be fine. It always is.”

Oh, my brain helpfully kicks in before I ask what she means. Melody’s mom is in the army. From what I’ve heard, she’s pretty used to being moved around. And yet every year, her mom still makes sure to send her back here, no matter where she’s stationed in the States. With how much Melody loves camp, I’m happy her mom does that much for her. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to move around enough to not have a concrete set of friends, or have to get used to leaving them behind.

I’d give her a hug if I didn’t think she might stab me with a fork.

Holding the door open for my girls gives me a chance to scan Otter Hall, and my eyes find the boys of Coyote Cabin quickly. They look…glum, in a way, even though they’re mixed with Daniel’s boys. To me, that should mean that they’re happy. Both cabins are problems, and they love getting together to make things worse.

Daniel looks just as put out, though that might be because he hasn’t had his morning cups of coffee yet. He’s sitting with Darcy and Shawn, who I rarely talk to and never seem to be in the same ‘cabin group’ as me.

After two years of it, I’ve started to think that Shawn Torres—counselor extraordinaire—doesn’t like me very much. His eyes find mine and he leans over to whisper something to Darcy, who also turns to look at me with something strange on her face I can’t read.

Then she gets up, and before I can get to the small window to pick up my plate of breakfast, she’s in front of me and walking into my space quickly enough that I step back, effectively waylaid from my goal.

“It’s a bit early for whatever this is,” I point out, eyes narrowed as I cross my arms loosely over my chest. Nothing in me wants to deal with Darcy this morning. Especially when she looks almost happy about…something.

Again, I cast a quick look around the dining hall, knowing that if Kayde sees her, he’s probably going to start something that might not end well. But he isn’t here. Not near his kids, or Daniel, or even Kinsley and Liza when I spot them with Kinsley’s cabin against the other wall.

“I just wanted to see your face when I asked what happened.” Yeah, Darcy is definitely thrilled about this, though I can’t tell why. Still, my attention drifts back to her, and I tilt my head just enough to be curious, one brow raised.

“What happened…?” There’s no way that she’d heard Kayde and me in my cabin last night. No way in hell. But the thought that she could’ve sends a rush of embarrassment through me that I fight to push down. “You’re going to have to be more specific. This has been a long week, and I haven’t eaten yet.”