Always Have (Always #1)

“All right, then,” he says. “I expect a Super Bowl out of that kid.”

“That’s the goal,” I say.

We talk about sports for a while. It’s our usual topic. Half the time when I visit, we just sit and watch a game. He’s having a harder time as his body deteriorates, and I think he gets pretty lonely. I try to keep it light, and act like we’re sitting in his living room at his old house.

He finishes his drink. “You should clean this up and put the bottle away before the nurse comes,” he says.

“No problem.” I polish off the last of my whiskey. “Do you want me to take the bottle and bring it back next week?”

“No, I can keep the bottle in the cupboard,” he says. “But the nurses will give me fewer dirty looks if I don’t have it sitting out.”

I grab our glasses and clean everything up. “Did Kylie come by yet?” I ask when I come back to the living room.

“She came for lunch,” he says. “Brought me a cake.”

I smile. “That’s not surprising.”

A serious look crosses his face. “How is she?”

“Didn’t you say you just saw her?” I ask.

“I did,” he says. “But I’m never sure if she means it when she says she’s fine. I worry about my girl.”

I smile at him. “Yeah, I think she’s good. Last time we hung out, she seemed okay.” I neglect to mention that the last time I saw her, she was passed out drunk on Selene’s couch, looking ridiculously hot in nothing but my t-shirt. To be fair, she was break-up drinking with Selene, but I don’t think her dad needs to hear about that.

“Is she seeing anyone?” he asks.

I shrug, keeping my face casual. I wish she would just tell her dad what’s going on. I hate having to talk to him about her love life. “Not that I know of.”

He’s silent for a long moment, staring into space. “I hope she settles down soon.”

I look over at him in surprise, not sure what to say.

“Having a daughter is a scary thing,” he says, his voice quiet. “At first, you’re worried about them meeting the wrong guy. Then they get a little older, and you start to worry about them meeting the right guy.” He meets my eyes. “Now, I have to face the fact that I won’t be able to walk my little girl down the aisle. Hell, I don’t know if I’ll be around to roll her down the aisle either.”

Fucking shit. I blow out a breath to get rid of the tightness in my chest. “You will be.”

“I’m sorry, Braxton,” he says with a shake of his head. “What about you? Any closer to settling down?”

“Not really.” The thing with Jessica went on a little longer than I planned. We saw each other for a few weeks, although the sex wasn’t that great. It’s never really what I’m hoping for. The fling didn’t amount to anything, and for once, it wasn’t me who broke it off. It was a relief when she told me—saved me the trouble of having to be the asshole again. At least that’s one girl who came in and out of my life who doesn’t hate me.

“I hope you find the right woman someday,” he says. “I’d like to see you happy.”

I laugh to hide the way my throat catches. I’ve never admitted the truth about my feelings for Kylie to anyone, but especially not to him.

“I’d like to see all three of you happy,” he continues. “You and Selene are my family, just as much as Kylie. I want you to know that.”

“I know.”

“I feel like maybe I should have done more for you and your sister,” he says. “I could have been around more.”

“I’m not sure where all this is coming from,” I say, “but you don’t have anything to feel bad about. Selene and I got dealt a shitty hand, but we survived. We’re both reasonably healthy adults. We had Aunt Cindy to take care of us, and you were there a hell of a lot more than you’re giving yourself credit for.”

He lets out a heavy sigh. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Is something wrong?” I ask. Fuck, if he’s dying or something…

“No, no,” he says. “Birthdays just bring out the worst in me as I get older. I start thinking about regrets.”